The Avalanche Effect

When an avalanche occurs, as the snow slides down the slope any slab present begins to fragment into increasingly smaller tumbling fragments. If the fragments become small enough the avalanche takes on the characteristics of a fluid. When sufficiently fine particles are present they can become airborne and, given a sufficient quantity of airborne snow, this portion of the avalanche can become separated from the bulk of the avalanche and travel a greater distance as a powder snow avalanche. Scientific studies using radar, following the 1999 Galtür avalanche disaster, confirmed suspicions that a saltation layer forms between the surface and the airborne components of an avalanche, which can also separate from the bulk of the avalanche.

Driving a (non-airborne) avalanche is the component of the avalanche’s weight parallel to the slope; as the avalanche progresses any unstable snow in its path will tend to become incorporated, so increasing the overall weight. This force will increase as the steepness of the slope increases, and diminish as the slope flattens. Resisting this are a number of components that are thought to interact with each other: the friction between the avalanche and the surface beneath; friction between the air and snow within the fluid; fluid-dynamic drag at the leading edge of the avalanche; shear resistance between the avalanche and the air through which it is passing, and shear resistance between the fragments within the avalanche itself. An avalanche will continue to accelerate until the resistance exceeds the forward force.

I recognized one of the two gals walking in front of me. The other appeared to be new. Such a development would be shocking as the other business in the office building in which I work is constantly downsizing. If they were hiring, perhaps the economy might actually be getting less weak. Then she turned. As I caught sight of her face, I realized that I did know both girls. The one I thought was new had simply gotten a short new haircut to go with her now-giant ass and ever expanding thighs. In the four years I’ve known her, she has not been downsizing. She has been working in the opposite direction. I suspected the new shorter ‘do was meant to complement her new rounder, plumper face, but I could be wrong. I’m not a gay homosexual so I’m not sure which hair length is better for chubby round faces. I’m better with color and skin tone.

For example, I was once getting a haircut when a striking gal exited the building to many compliments. The girl who cuts my hair said that exiting girl had just gone dark after years of blond. I opined that I imagined the dark hair was a strong improvement as her olive skin tone would fight with blond hair. The girl who cuts my hair then told me I was right and that she was surprised I knew that. Then she asked if she might have a turkey baster of my obviously superior genetic material so that she might cuckold her husband.

Nah, she really offered to extract it the old fashioned way.

Okay, she really didn’t ask for any of my private reserve, but she did give me a lot of extra boob to head action. Boob on head action is a normal part of any haircut, but it usually ceases once you’ve finished, left the chair, and headed to the register to pay. She had to drag a stool over since I’m taller than she.

But enough about me, let’s go back to the gal who is gaining mass and approaching a terminal velocity.

When I first met her, she was in the 6.5 – 7 range. Not super duper hot, but definitely cute. Young. Pretty, tight body. A little light in the boob area, particularly when compared to the size of her ass. Signs and portents.

There are several ways to prevent avalanches and lessen their power and destruction; active preventative measures reduce the likelihood and size of avalanches by disrupting the structure of the snow pack; passive measures reinforce and stabilize the snow pack in situ. The simplest active measure is by repeatedly traveling on a snow pack as snow accumulates; this can be by means of boot-packing, ski-cutting, or machine grooming.

At the end of my first year in said office building, the change was subtle. She was carrying a few extra pounds, but she was not yet a snowball. She told stories about drinking with the girls and her favorite buffets. She really enjoyed sitting. Her brief dalliance with golf ended when the avid golfer dumped her. Took on a new boyfriend, a younger guy, who liked having a girl with a car who could buy booze. She had the upper hand. More buffets, more signs and portents, more growth.

During years two and three, the metamorphosis continued, but the creep was slow. Tree sap accumulations, slowly hardening over time and becoming part of the view. She went from “she’s letting herself go” to snowball. There was still time to turn back, to prevent the eventual slide.

Passive preventive systems such as Snow fences and light walls can be used to direct the placement of snow. Snow builds up around the fence, especially the side that faces the prevailing winds. Downwind of the fence, snow buildup is lessened. This is caused by the loss of snow at the fence that would have been deposited and the pickup of the snow that is already there by the wind, which was depleted of snow at the fence. When there is a sufficient density of trees, they can greatly reduce the strength of avalanches. They hold snow in place and when there is an avalanche, the impact of the snow against the trees slows it down. Trees can either be planted or they can be conserved, such as in the building of a ski resort, to reduce the strength of avalanches.

As I have now seen with mine own eyes, inertia has won. The slow creep has netted another victim and the taut young 20 year old has become the flabby 24 year old. She still has a boyfriend, a schlub of a younger man who is probably still happy to grind up on the older woman who daily drives his car to work and probably provides him a place in which to live. Not so sure about food. Something tells me that in that household one has to be either quick or Jack Spratt.

Avalanches are classified by their morphological characteristics, and are rated by either their destructive potential, or the mass of the downward flowing snow. Some of the morphological characteristics used to classify avalanches include the type of snow involved, the nature of the failure, the sliding surface, the propagation mechanism of the failure, the trigger of the avalanche, the slope angle, direction, and elevation.

The snowflake fell from the sky and joined all the other special, unique flakes. The storm that produced them provided sufficient variety such that all the young boys could claim some fun. Even the snowflakes which became snowballs were included. Some snowballs began to tumble, gaining strength, accumulating mass. Inertia took over. The snow fences, light walls, and trees proved futile. As it has become and threatens to forever be, another victim strode forth from the carnage and sought to pack 30 lbs of ass into a pair of jeans that didn’t fit 15 lbs ago.

Take heed of the signs and portents, special little snowflakes. Though the hill is steep, there is no reason to dive headfirst down it and absorb all the detritus which you pass. Inertia is a harsh mistress and she produces many a cold and crushing spinster.