The Eyes are the Gateway to the Boobs
Last week’s posts on nice guys spawned a lively discussion. SDaedalus, being a lass who seeks men in between pure alpha and pure beta, i.e. men who enjoy long-term relationships but who are exciting enough to keep the sparks flying in a relationship, wrote of nice guys:
I think a lot of guys without any other major problems (e.g. who are quite secure generally, and who might be absolutely fine once you were going out with them) really mess up over timing e.g. they don’t work to build attraction before asking out (Game is all about building attraction very quickly, guys sometimes read from this that the woman will either be attracted immediately or not at all, that is not necessarily true where Game is not being employed) or never actually come to the point (I suspect that quite a few guys, who complain about girls not liking nice guys, actually ask out very few girls for fear of rejection)
Since I used to be such a guy, I don’t doubt the veracity of this statement. When young and single, I briefly developed a habit of immediately going in for the kill. It was better than simply remaining forlorn, but my approach essentially guaranteed the answer I was going to get. I didn’t try to build attraction, I just pounced. I also went for failed strategy B. I built the attraction, but waited too long to seal the deal. Both strategies produced the same result – I stayed single.
Practice is the only way to defeat the cycle. Talk to people. Engage them in coversation.
When it comes to the ladies, don’t stare at their sweater puppets while engaging them in coversation. You’ve got to look them in the eye. I get it, it’s hard. Luscious tatas are like magnets, begging for your ravenous stare. If you give in and indulge in the magnificent display of mammarian munificence, you may win the battle, but you shall lose the war. Look up, young man, for it is her eyes which lead to discovery of her bounty.
Eye contact is an important component of Western communication. Whether going after a job, negotiating the price of a car, or seeking to secure the company of a lady, eye contact is crucial. It displays value. It signals self-confidence and strength. It keeps ladies from getting defensive.
Eye contact and facial expressions provide important social and emotional information; people, perhaps without consciously doing so, probe each other’s eyes and faces for positive or negative mood signs. In some contexts, the meeting of eyes arouses strong emotions.
Eye contact is also an important element in flirting, where it may serve to establish and gauge the other’s interest in some situations.
Mutual eye contact that signals attraction initially begins as a brief glance and progresses into a repeated volleying of eye contact, according to Beverly Palmer, Ph.D. and professor of psychology at California State University, Dominguez Hills.
Eye contact is not natural for the shy guys. That is why you have to practice. If you can’t look a girl in the eye, you will never master any sort of game. Witty banter, disarming negs, and deft shit-test avoidance, when delivered into the floor, are mushmouthed displays of lower status. Those displays presuppose rejection. Remember, like repels like. If you want to touch the boobs, you cannot be a boob. Look into her eyes and engage her in conversation. Then you shall be on the path to that which you seek.
Thank you Ulysses, I appreciate your efforts in my regard.
For my part (I can hardly type this without laughing) I will try to avoid my boobs becoming too much of a distraction.
[I actually suggest you make them more distracting. The ability to maintain frame and focus is important.]
[I actually suggest you make them more distracting. The ability to maintain frame and focus is important.]
I will do my b(r)e(a)st.
Dude, boobs as shit test. Talk about raising the bar….
[I don't suggest all women adopt this strategy. Boobs as a shit test is fairly specific to SDaedalus, and girls like her, as I came up with this after her first comment. She's too well versed to handle a beta who is posturing. She's got to throw down the gauntlet.
My high school sweetheart essentially did this to me. After heavy petting began but before it truly progressed, she wore an extremely accentuating top, it was a tight charcoal gray turtleneck sweater, on a date. Seeing them in that sweater meant I had to touch and I did, once we were alone. Later she commented that she did that on purpose, but was initially afraid it wasn't working. I was staring all night, I just did so without her noticing. Had I stared all night, I bet she would've changed her mind and thrown up many more roadblocks than I had to overcome.]
She’s got to throw down the gauntlet.
Or pull down the neckline.
PS: I only hope my boobs are up to the test.
I’ve never felt like guys stare at my boobs. Although I have a good argument for the fact that the do. On the day’s I wear more revealing things on top I get more attention. But I never actively notice it. I do however notice when I guy won’t make eyecontact with me. And for the kind of guys that are attracted to me that happens frighteningly often. It’s an immeadiate anti-aphrodasiac. But don’t stare into my soul either as I had a friend of mine who was won’t to do.
[Whether staring at the boobs or the soul, too much too soon is too much too soon.]